I know exactly what you’re thinking, how can you possibly prepare for childbirth, pain CHECK.  You’ve heard a million stories about how painful childbirth is and it’s gotten you scared to death, but I have a secret to tell you… It doesn’t have to be a horrible experience.

Years ago, I watched a documentary called, The Business of Being Born.  At the time, it was on Netflix, it’s not there anymore.  It talked about all of the negative side effects of epidurals on the baby, the risks of using Pitocin, long story short, it made me want to have a natural childbirth (AKA no drugs).  But everyone says that when they’re not pregnant, when you finally are, it’s a whole different ball game.  

From the start, my birth plan stated, absolutely no drugs.  I did a ton of research on natural birth.  I tried to get a midwife, which my insurance refused to pay for, then I looked for a hospital that was known for allowing women to deliver the way that they wanted to (George Washington University Hospital).  Next up was finding a way to deal with the pain.

Many studies have been performed and there are A LOT of options out there.  Hypnobirthing seemed to be the one that everyone was raving about.  It was expensive and I knew from my past that I was not able to be hypnotized, it was out.  The next thing that I came upon was a theory (by a man) that intense pain during child birth was the result of fear.  The fear caused the body to tense, which led to increased pain and often times longer deliveries.  So I decided, that I wasn’t going to fear the process.  Now you’re wondering, how the heck do I do that? 

The  MOST IMPORTANT rule of thumb, DO NOT LISTEN TO WOMEN WHO WANT TO TELL YOU THEIR HORROR STORY.  This will only make you fearful.  I convinced myself that my labor was not going to be painful because I put together the most relaxing environment that could be imagined.  I arranged to have a jacuzzi birth (my friend told me that warm water helped her tremendously).  A candle warmer in my room would release the scent of a lavender candle.  The lights would be dimmed so there was only enough light to allow the doctor to see what she was doing.  A doula would be by myside throughout the entire process.  A personal playlist of music that relaxed me would play lightly in the background.  It would be perfect.  Well, everything is perfect until delivery day.

For starters, I broke my ankle about a week before my daughter was due, jacuzzi birth out.  After one and half weeks post due date, my daughter was still chilling in my womb.  After reviewing the risks of a 42 week pregnancy I decided to be induced.  The night before my induction, I woke up in the middle of the night, about two hours after I had gone to be, in order to pee, as was custom.  I didn’t turn on the lights as I made my way to the toilet.  While leaving the bathroom, I felt a gush of fluid.  I was so excited, it was finally happening!  I turned on the light thinking that my water had broken.  I placed my hand on my leg, in the wet spot, only to pull it up and see that it was covered in blood…

Written by

Momma T

I am a single mom, a Naval Officer, and an attorney. I had my daughter during my second year of law school. With a baby on my hip, I pushed through the last year of school, passed the bar, and decided to run for Congress. One day my phone rang and I was told that I would be deploying for a year and I would have to leave my daughter behind.

So, after three deployments, one and half years of living overseas, and four and half years of driving both an aircraft carrier and an amphibious helicopter carrier, I would say good-bye to my little one, drop out of my Congressional race, and once again put on my marching boots.